an ode to vacuums
I was mid vacuum session when I was overcome with gratitude and appreciation. I had to write my feelings down. What else is one to do when they are struck so profoundly by love and adoration?!?!
Vacuuming is my spiritual vocation.
It cleanses my soul.
When I’m feeling grubby,
I head for the storage cupboard.
There I know I will find my friend,
Who is always there for me,
Ready to serve my interests,
Something it does so well.
Where there was disorder, there is order
Where I felt lazy and down-trodden, I now feel productive and heroic.
Where would I be without the vacuum, to whom I owe so much
Oh, vacuum
With you in my hands I feel like I could just about solve any problem in the world
Not with your powers of course,
But through how you inspire me.
You make me feel invincible.
We make a great team.
How many bad days have been miraculously transformed?
You help me turn feelings of inner hopelessness and despair
into something wonderful,
something beautiful,
into an accomplishment.
Vacuuming is a spiritual act, it’s holy, it’s sacred.
It contains a healing power.
It’s that potent and effective,
It should be administered by doctors.
